March 25

Day 11: and staying busy while wondering if I'm staying busy doing the right things. Way too much time to over-analyze.

I find myself second-guessing our (my) approach to communicating, to teaching, to serving you all. I wonder if I should "broaden the platform," or if we should reconsider recording sermons. Everyone out "there" is telling the rest of us that we need to do more, and here are "21 things every pastor in America should be doing." No pressure.

I was on (another) Zoom call yesterday, and the moderator told us (quite forcefully) that we all need to have a 3-6 month plan, and have it now. It left me feeling like I'm always the last kid in line; a little slow on the uptake.

As I read this early morning, and coupled with 2 Samuel 10 and 1 Chronicles 19, Psalm 20 starts with "May the LORD answer you in the day of trouble! May he send you help from the sanctuary and give you support from Zion!" I see this to mean, it is the Lord who responds to our needs. And, he will often use the "sanctuary," or "Zion" (both references to the gathered people of God) to convey/channel His answer/s. Today, I am asking Radiant pastors and others for help, to learn how they're doing things, and why. Who knows, I may be calling you (?)

The Psalm continues with "May he remember all your offerings and regard with favor your burnt sacrifices." Okay, I can perhaps recount the times I've given to the church (because I have a spreadsheet), but I cannot recall a single time I've lit up a burnt offering. This verse really needs to be included with what follows...

"May he grant you your heart's desire and fulfill all your plans! May we shout for joy over your salvation, and in the name of our God set up our banners! may the LORD fulfill all your petitions." Any motivation I have to give, to serve, to care, even to petition God is dependent on the primacy of joy in who God is and what he's done for me. All of it underserved. Setting up banners (rally points) are to be in the name of our God...not my name, my reputation, what anyone perceives of my workload, or anything else that would sway me away from my gospel identity.

It continues. "Now I know that the LORD saves his anointed; he will answer him from his holy heaven and the saving might of his right hand." Thank God for that. I'm not a very good savior. I've tried, and failed many times in the past. I appreciate being reminded that you and I are "anointed," marked and equipped for a special, ultimate purpose...to be His.

Then, it says, "Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God. They collapse and fall, but we rise and stand upright." I love this, because it reveals the culture we live in, and my judgmental heart toward our culture. It also reveals my hypocrisy, the many times I try to manipulate, control, dictate my circumstances.

So, the final thought of Psalm 20 is, "O LORD, save the king! May he answer us when we call."

I'm "calling" today. I'm praying with a fervency I perhaps have not felt before. I'm really missing our guys' Friday morning prayer gatherings in Joel's garage. I'm missing you!

May He answer us when we call, while in the name of our God we set up our banners!

-Mike Rydman, Lead Pastor, Radiant Church | Juneau